I was inspired to do a quick trip to upstate NY this fall to attend Nyungne retreat at the Padmasambhava Center. The center is one of the few in the Dudjom Tersar lineage and I was hoping to received teachings from the center's founders but alas, it was mostly a practice based retreat. Definitely one of the more physically challenging retreats due to the fasting aspects and I am glad to be in a formal retreat after so many years of not doing any retreats.

So my first anniversary of ngondro practice is coming up in a few days and I've been thinking about the significance of the practice in my life. I can't quite say it has been so transformative that I quit my life in suburbia and went off on some pilgrimage to find my 'spiritual' home of sorts. Alas, I have certainly thought about making such a drastic change and asking my teachers if I should do such a thing but I feel like I already know the answer. Which is to say, I know enough that just changing the outer circumstances doesn't change the obscurations of my mind and habit. Fundamentally, I have the time/resources to fully practice where I am at even though I don't 'like' it here. Which is to say, I need to focus on the present state of auspicious conditions that has allow a fairly consistent practice in the last year and get over the ego's likes/dislikes/perceptions.